The Forever Blaze, The Phoenix's Flight

I am strong. No one can or will stand in my way. I follow my dreams and I believe in a bright future. The fire in my eyes burns brightly with determination in meeting my goals. I cannot be stopped, this fire is too intense. I cannot be stopped, it burns through everyone who tries to bring me down. Your hate, your rejection, your will to make sure I fail will not douse this flame,. I am the Phoenix. I rise from the ashes, reborn. And I soar beyond all expectations. They tell me "You'll never make it". They chant "Your hopes are nothing and your dreams are worthless". Their negativity doesn't hurt me, not at all.  They yearn for my failure, they want me to fall. But I won't listen. Their hate does nothing but motivate me to do better.  As my motivation rises, my fire flares even brighter and brighter. My soul is ignited, free, wild. My will is strong enough to crush all. My determination and anticipation for success will scorch anything and everything. I will not be stopped, and I will make all of my dreams a reality. I shouldn't have to worry about people like you destroying everything I believe in. I shouldn't have to live in fear of your neglect and spiteful words. It doesn't matter if you want me to succeed or not. The only thing that matters is my will to move on. My final goal. I should really stop wondering about what people think of me, and learn to only worry about my own self-satisfaction. They will only drag me down, extinguish my flame. Why would I want that? It's time that I showed them what this fire could really do. Get out of my way, or prepare to get burned.


It's funny how they think that they can hold me back, bring me down. It's interesting to think about what goes through their ignorant heads every time they try to bring down. Do they not understand? It doesn't matter how many times I may fall. It doesn't matter how many times they can take out my flames. I am the Phoenix. And like a Phoenix, I will always rise again. I will be reborn, rejuvenated, free once again. I will soar again, like a brilliant fire in the sky. They may hate me. They may await my downfall. But just like the Phoenix, you can assure yourself that I will come back. I will  reappear, and then I'll show you how much damage I can really do. This flame? Is unstoppable. This confidence? Is unbreakable. My flight? Is not over yet, so don't celebrate too soon. As long as my will to live burns, my driving force to succeed. You will never defeat me, and like the graceful....yet destructive phoenix, I will return for round two....to finish what I started.

Phoenix

Out of my ashes
will rise a new phoenix.

A soaring being
returning from death
proving once again
that life is eternal.

I live forever
because the spirit
never dies.

I will return
in another body
in another time,
but it is me.

The me who is me now
will always be.

As long as I live,
I learn.
And I live
F o r e v e r

The Tears Of My Heartbreak, My Triumphant Awakening

As I sit here in the dark, and the silence is mocking me. It tells me how much I screwed up and how I shouldn't have given up. It tells me that I needed to man up, to stand up and finally take control......But I can't. As I sit here in the derailing silence....the ominous quiet, I'm crying. With every teardrop comes a memory. As they fall gracefully to the floor below, I can see. In each individual drop, I can see a conversation, a smile, a kiss we once shared. I remember how great we were and how desperately I want to have that feeling you once gave me back. When those droplets finally hit the ground, they meet their grave. So does every little memory replaying in each. I cry at my mistake. I weep at my loss. I become infuriated with myself. "How could I be so weak?" "How could I let things turn out the way they did?" You were the only person that was able to place a permanent smile on my face. Only you, could bring the happiness that overflowed from my being. Now, I'm left suffering. I'm left alone, and that smile I once had is now erased. It will never be the same. We will never be the same. We spent a short time together. We never got a chance to grow. Even though the time we shared seemed insignificant, the joy you brought and the impact you made will forever be implanted in my heart. Have you ever had that feeling you get when you know that you've loss something great? Do you know how it feels to be pressured to end something magnificent? The pain is unbearable, and it makes my eyes pour. Those wounds are forever fresh, which makes me cry even more. They say that time heals all wounds. Well until that happens.......I'll sit here, alone in the silence, alone in the dark, alone with myself. It's funny, you told me that you'd be there for me whenever I needed you. Who would've thought that right now, after you've gone away, would be the time that I needed you the most?




Before, I used to sit and cry in a whirlwind of negative thoughts about how I screwed up. Before I used to moan and complain about how I desperately wanted to make it better. That was the old me, the naive me. I'm much wiser now. I've learned that everyone has their falls at some point in their life. I taught myself to rise from those falls, and to make each negative into a positive. Dwelling on the past will only keep me from reaching my ultimate goal, my future. I have to move on.....even if I don't want to. We all have obstacles to face in this thing we call life. We all have to suffer before we find happiness. Well I can say that my suffering is over. I will no longer let the past haunt me. I will conquer it, my fear of forgetting. I can never forget all the times we had together. They made me stronger. You made me stronger. You made me happy and you've earned a permanent place in my heart. I used to cry an overwhelming amount of tears whenever I thought of you. Every time I spoke your name, depression would instantly rain over me. But like I said, that was the old me. The new me, smiles at the thought of you. The new me, is thankful for what you've done to keep me sane. The new me, has learned to accept the fact that our lives travel different paths.......and that's fine with me. Never will I forget how you used to make me feel. Never will I forget the smile on your face. Never will I forget that you made me who I am today. This is my triumphant awakening, my time of renewal. It's time I move on from the past, and make sure that it never brings me down again.

the hardest thing to do in life is say goodbye

today i learned a lesson
that will always be true
saying goodbye to someone
is the hardest thing to do

I've never felt a loss
until i said goodbye
i thought i was strong
and i broke down and cried

never will i forget
the times we had
though the reflections are happy
it makes me rather sad

the most brutal of men
cries at the past
i only wish 
the good times would last

so i humor myself
I'd smile if i could
why can't things work out?
because life isn't supposed to be that good